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Another Creepy Christmas

by Jonah Knight

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1.
Perfect Tree 02:22
The ghost of Christmas past Won't let your memory pass I've been walking around this holiday Wishing that you were here as the seasons change Well, oh well The mist and icy snow I wish for mistletoe This arctic wind is nothing but freezing And our perfect tree I dream it's navy green and growing down out of the ceiling Some how December lasts forever My imagination wins best picture Maybe it's picture perfect if I can put us in it Some how December is never really worth it Well, oh well The mist and icy air The red scarf you used to wear Always conjured up that holiday feeling And our perfect tree I dream it's navy green and growing down out of the ceiling There was magic in the air the day that they took us down All the banks we knocked off and the people that we gunned down And it took the FBI to finally track us down Track us down... It's too bad we won't be going home Another 25 Christmases alone It's really too bad we ran through out luck And it's really too bad that all the charges stuck Well, oh well And I couldn't believe the way you looked When you grabbed the judge around the neck and shook Whenever I remember that I wind up laughing And our perfect tree I dream it's navy green and growing down out of the ceiling
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So you say you wanna move to Iceland For the people and the land and the sky But before you go you really should know what happens there at Christmas time Here come the Yuletide Lads 13 trolls, live in a hole Here they come, one by one Sneaking into your home Sheep-Cote Clod will harass your sheep Gully Gawk will steal all the milk you drink Stubby will eat all the crust you leave in the sink Spoon-Licker will lick all your spoons in a blink Here come the Yuletide Lads 13 trolls, live in a hole Here they come, one by one Sneaking into your home Pot-Scraper snacks on your leftovers till they’re done Bowl-Licker cleans all your bowls with his tongue Door-Slammer causes a commotion while you sleep Skyr-Gobbler sucks up your yogurt through his teeth Here come the Yuletide Lads 13 trolls, live in a hole Here they come, one by one Sneaking into your home Sausage-Swiper doesn’t care if they’re spicy or they’re sweet Window-Peeper peeps in on your peeper when you peep Doorway-Sniffer loves the stink from your feet Meat-Hook uses a hook to steal your meat Candle-Stealer creeps after little children and eats up all their candles because he thinks that they are a tasty treat So, I hope that you move to Iceland And I hope you enjoy your stay But bring your gun and a bottle of rum Cuz the Yuletide lads will visit you someday
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Mikey: My baby she comes by Her arms are piled high Presents all for me I hope I like 'em Even if I don't She'll take off her coat We'll spend all night unwrapping Chorus: Jingle bells are all you hear Blinking lights are all you see And the reason for the season is a 12 day shopping spree Gettin' lots of stuff Gettin' real drunk And now you know what Christmas means to me Jonah: I love the way new snow Crunches underneath my toes I always think it sounds just like cracking bones I like to catch the eye Of all the passersby And remember that they're soulless zombie dead-weight corporate clones Chorus: Jingle bells are all you hear Blinking lights are all you see And the reason for the season is a 12 day shopping spree Gettin' lots of stuff Gettin' real drunk And now you know what Christmas means to me Mikey: Cruising down the avenue in my one horse open sleigh Picking up my lady for a naughty night of cosplay She calls me pappa Christmas, loves my sack of toys I've got an inflatable Rudolph that I bought from the choir boys Jonah: I decorate with glee My solstice pagan tree In my heart I know the Jesus was just a man The Atheists will rise With guns and bombs, harpoons and knives You wanted a war on Christmas well my friend I think it just began Chorus: Jingle bells are all you hear Blinking lights are all you see And the reason for the season is a 12 day shopping spree Gettin' lots of stuff Gettin' real drunk And now you know what Christmas means to me
8.
Santa Baby 02:39
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The Krampus 03:53
Saint Nicholas is a good man Rewarding your purity If you're kind, he'll be generous Underneath your Christmas tree But his brother is different He doesn't care for the innocent Rotten children hide in fear cry until dawn on Christmas day. The Krampus is an evil man If he is a man at all There are whispers of his legend Growing louder as the snow starts to fall And he won't leave bad children coal Blow out the heat and make them cold He snatches them up stuffs them in a sack drags them to Hell on Christmas day. He creeps down from the mountains In the biting ice of the winter He hunts out wicked children Village to village every December His hide will keep him warm Bloody claws and sharpened horns He will return back to his cave with children for supper on Christmas day. Saint Nicholas is a good man Spreading hope from the light The Krampus is an evil man Sowing panic in the night And so, next Christmas time Please keep this in your mind If you hold hate in your heart it'll shine like a beacon on Christmas day.
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A collection of creepy Christmas songs! Finally! Half originals, half odd versions of classics.

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released November 1, 2012

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Jonah Knight Fair Oaks, California

Jonah is the world's premier Paranormal Modern Folk musician. From a singer/songwriter background, his songs are about ghosts, monsters, supernatural creepiness, and steampunk.

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